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Battle For Forever

This Year, Like Last Year, My Birthday Gift Is A Punch To The Side Of The Head

Okay, first off, if you’re reading this, είμαι πατήσαμε! I’d rather not translate that. Let’s just say, I’m breaking about a dozen rules here. Easy. I’ll probably get grounded for it. And by grounded, I don’t mean I’ll have to stay in my room unable to go out the next twenty-five Saturday nights, I mean, grounded. Into dust. And buried under a thousand pounds of rock.

That kind of grounded.

But that’s the least of my worries.

The fact that you’re reading this means that wherever you are people can still print things or electronically disseminate information. You’re alive. You might even have electricity. I hate to tell you, I’m not sure how long that’s going to last.

You see, they have a plan. And believe me when I say this, time is on their side.

I have no idea who you are or how you got a hold of this, but for my sake, I hope you’re under a hundred.

Someone once told me my name means “the defender of mankind.” Unfortunately, it may actually come to that.

They call me Alexander the Pretty Good.

Which is probably about right.

I’m a junior at Middleton—

No, wait...that was the last one.

—Monument High School in a small town with a big name, nestled in the Berkshires, which are these really beautiful low mountains in the Middle of Nowhere, Massachusetts. The biggest thing that ever happens here is people come from all over the world to see the leaves turning colors in the fall.

Dead leaves. That’s the highlight.

And in less than an hour, I’ve got a mammoth end-of-semester U.S. history test given by a teacher who rambles on like she knew our founding fathers personally—especially Thomas Jefferson, ‘He was a cad,’ she’d say with a grin—and looks old enough to actually have known them.

But this isn’t about the misery of my second period history class or some wry, witty, angsty journal about my high school experience. Believe me, I wouldn’t be putting one word of this faex down if it wasn’t a lot bigger than that. Maybe you’ve got your own issues and think you don’t have time to hear this. Maybe things seem pretty good where you are. Or maybe you’re dealing with the kind of shit that comes down in buckets, and maybe you want to know why the hell that is. Maybe this will help explain. More importantly, maybe it’ll give us a way out of this mess.