The Velvet Sledgehammer

velvetcover 2016 450dpi

Billy Gerrick has been raised since childhood
to be the best in the world at what he does.

Argue.

The Wall Street Journal calls him “The best thing to happen to world trade since the boat.” The President praises him as a “Great American.” His beautiful, well-connected girlfriend thinks he’s the kindest, most generous man alive.

Only Billy Gerrick knows the truth…he’s a ticking time bomb. An overachieving flawed hero who has held it together by sheer will.

Now, on the eve of finalizing the most extensive international agreement in the history of mankind, he is forced to confront a past he’d rather forget—the tortured triumphs, the comical failures, the painful childhood—when his girlfriend chooses this historic moment to pressure him about settling down and having kids. But if Billy Gerrick knows anything, he knows he’s the last person on earth that should be in charge of raising a child.

This is the hilarious, unbridled, unapologetic journey through the life of a man who is part Holden Caulfield, part Alexander Portnoy, and part Sun Tzu all rolled into one.

A relentless, insanely funny—mostly true—story about a thirty-something finally coming to terms with growing up.

THIS IS A MAINSTREAM ADULT NOVEL FOR MATURE AUDIENCES. Enough said.

Penetrating Questions

I don’t know how I got to be here. The height of my career. The height of forty-one thousand feet, heading into a storm. And not the meteorological kind, although one of those is on its way, too. On my way to Geneva. On my way to change the world.

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OUT OF THE LOOP

A mittened hand reached up and tucked in the errant flap of tin foil escaping from under the knit cap covering the large head. A loose yarn on the mitten tangled itself on the corner of the foil before it was rescued by a second mitten. Liquid blue eyes, translucent, captivating, sat behind a set of dense lashes, pulling attention away from an unremarkable face.


Check Out IDIOTS IN THE MACHINE Today!

Idiots in the Machine is my debut novel. It's kind of a cult classic. The Velvet Sledgehammer is coming in 2023, and it's definitely NSFW.

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